Here we are almost 9 months in and I am STILL trying to find balance in my life! We are always moving forward and on the go, but always feeling a little frazzle-dazzled!
We had some sort of a routine, then BAM – summer hit! It threw off everything! It made it harder to do a lot of things, and easier at the same time! Having the older kiddos home was awesome. We had a lot of lazy mornings and even lazier afternoons. We didn’t socialize a ton, but spent a lot of time bonding more as a family. Play dates were almost non- existent but the girls were fine with having a friend over for an occasional sleepover here and there. It worked.
My time with “friends” was more limited. Unless someone called and invited me somewhere, I didn’t invite or plan a lot. Not because I didn’t need time with friends but more because the logistics of four kiddos didn’t always pan out with hubby’s work schedule or my energy level. Thankfully we had passes to the water park and I could sit with the baby while the older kiddos stayed together enjoying the park. We did that a few times.
At times, this summer felt lonely, but at other times it felt so full. I’m learning as I get older that time with my kids in limited and I have to go ALL IN and love on THEM!
I’m thankful for the friends who have stood beside me as I have withdrawn (from my norm) these past 9 months. I’m thankful for those gals that I can call and chat with at any time of the day… thankful for those friendships with gals who live far away…but we can pick up right where we left off, thankful for new friends in this new season of mothering a baby again, thankful for grace when I don’t have it all together. (I’m learning not to volunteer for so much!)
One hurdle that we have worked to overcome this summer is jealously. One of our kiddos is having a really hard time with the shift in attention. Her behavior issues have kept us at home more and have lead to many hours in tears and in prayer. We still aren’t quite sure what to do with it all but are seeking wisdom from doctors and mental health providers as well. We are hoping to have some sort of resolve in the near future.
Adoption been an amazing journey, navigating through being a new mommy again. We had closed the door on all things baby for almost 7 years and are now rediscovering and enjoying every stage of our little guys development. Things that frustrated me about the girls when they were little are laughable now. We don’t argue over who is going to do the 5AM feeding like we did with the girls, and washing bottles is a joy, as we know it’s only for a short season. Perspective has changed a lot and we are definitely less stressed out then we were when the girls were small. (I think age has a lot to do with that!)
A piece of (my time) pie is taken now with our sweet little guy and I am learning daily how to manage my time better but it’s a work in progress. We wouldn’t trade our decision to adopt for all of the money in the world. He brings us so much joy!
If you are a new mom and feel like life is out of balance, it’s totally normal. I have to step back and remind myself that this was a BIG change for my family and not one that we had a ton of time to prep for. You WILL find balance again, your “new normal” will look a little different then your old but it will be full of life and love. You will find new mercies every day!
